Showing posts from September, 2015

nothing like it

..... I think what you guys are doing is great.  I just hope that someday you can have a daughter that looks just like you.  Because there is nothing like it......

These words were spoken to me when we first announced we were adopting.  They hit me like a knife and continued to haunt me for years.  And then it happened.  I gave birth to a little girl.  A little girl with an undeniable resemblance to me.  As she grows, the photographs of our childhood look more and more like the same child.  I now have a daughter who many people think looks "just like me".  And I have discovered something.  Something that only a mom of both biological and adopted daughters can discover.

My heart cherishes my first memories of a little brown leg draped over my white arm and those big brown eyes staring at my own green ones.  And it also holds a precious moment of seeing a reflection in a mirror of a tiny face that reminded me of my own.

There is beauty in both.

As my girls grow, I love watch…

be kind to yourself

“One of the marks of a godly woman is that she takes responsibility for her soul’s need for joy and delight.A woman is a conductor, who leads the orchestra of her surroundings in the songs and music of her life.God is a God of creativity and dimension, and so He is pleased when we co-create beauty in our own realm, through the power of His Spirit.There was some point in my life when I accepted that no one else was going to take responsibility for me, and if I didn’t take care of myself, my soul would die a slow death by exhaustion, boredom, loneliness and mediocrity.” ~ Sally Clarkson

Can you relate to this quote from Sally Clarkson? These words resonate deeply in my soul. Especially the last line.   

I reached my point this summer.  

When you take a trip on an airplane, before you start your journey the stewardess first goes over all the safety tips with those on the plane.  She reminds the passengers that if there is a crisis they must first put on their own oxygen mask before making s…

basic chicken stock

The air is starting to turn from summer to fall and in our house that means the menu is also starting to change.  I love the cooler weather that makes you hungry for some hearty soup or spicy chili.  And as a bonus to the big family, hot crockpot meals are just what everyone wants.   Throw some stock, meat and veges in a pot and you have an instant meal.  The key to making it yummy is to start with a good stock.

I used to slice up fresh onions, garlic and veges to add to my leftover chicken bones and then cook it on the stove for hours.  But then one day, as I was throwing out the bits and pieces of garlic and onion from a meal, it hit me.  Why not just use those instead.  So now when I am cooking, I keep a bowl on the counter next to the cutting board.  All the peels, stems and left over pieces of veges go into the bowl and then into the freezer along with the remains of our chickens or turkeys.  Once I get about 2 gallon size freezer bags full, then it is time to make some stock.  …

when i look at my baby

Tomorrow morning our baby turns two years old.  Five months after our older daughter, Eliana, came home from China this little bundle started to grow in my womb.  God placed her there before we had time to consider and reconsider if we should or shouldn't.   Everyone was shocked and excited and then I was just so very sick.  Pregnancy and I are not great friends.  What is supposed to be a beautiful time in a woman's life was one of my darkest.  Months of longing to sleep and not wake up until it was over.  Months of somehow making it through each day accomplishing the bare minimum to keep my family going.  It should have been a time of bonding with my new daughter, but instead I couldn't get through two pages in a story book with out vomiting and the mere vibrations of feet walking across the floor made the nausea increase.  I spent many hours lying in my bed staring at the walls in my room praying for sleep.   The first time I held my baby I thought about those difficult…