The Bread of Life

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Or what what man is there among you who, when his son asks for a loaf, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, he will not give him a snake, will he? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! (Matthew 7:7-11)

I like to get up before the sun, before the kids, before the noise and just be with God. To be able to just sit with Him, read His word and pour out my heart and hear His. In order to make this happen with my early rising house, I have to get up by atleast 5:30. So that is the goal, unfortunately my physical body doesn't always agree with my soul, but the number of days that my soul wins are increasing.

On a recent early morning, during this quiet time with God, I was studying God the Father. I read the passage quoted above from the book of Matthew. As the words permeated my heart and mind, my soul began to cry. I thought about our adoption and admitted to God that I felt more like he was giving us stones than bread. Why was it taking so long? Why was the process every changing? And mostly why are there millions of children around the world who need a family and we can't seem to bring just one home? After I had confessed my true thoughts and let it all out, I started to hear His whisper..."I am the Loaf, it is about knowing Me"

While this waiting is horrible in the sense that I long for our daughter and it pains me to think of what she is experiencing right now, the journey over the past year has still been filled with incredible joy. The joy that can only come from personally knowing God. "I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world."(John 6:51) And somehow in the midst of this suffering our family begins to grasp in a tiny way the suffering of Christ.



Comments

  1. K.P.December 14, 2009 at 10:14 PM

    I sometimes look back and LONG to be as close to/dependent on God as I was during "the wait". Enjoy this time as much as humanly possible. Know, from one who knows, that it will be over soon and you will see clearly why God made you wait for your precious one. Any sooner or later and you would have the wrong child. God knows her and cares for her now. Soon, he will entrust that job to you and Kevin, but for now, she is in the perfect care of our Father.

    I love ya!!

    ReplyDelete

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